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Red Waffle
Journal
Bubble Boy
Wednesday, 3 September 2003
So, two years ago I came up with this philosophy of my life. Its start as something simple, and I think evolved into more. Two years ago I had a bunch of "friends." I use the term friends loosely, if you read my past journals it explains why. Anyway, this group of friends started to leave me out of the circle. They wouldn't invite me along with them to go mini-golfing or to the mall. Things would also go on in their lives that they wouldn't tell me. What you maybe be asking, well, I don't know, because they never told me. Some people refer to it as "drama." Things dealing with relationships or friendships and stuff like that. So, because of the lack of information and interaction between my "friends," I considered myself as a person living in a bubble. A person isolated from the world around them. Not by choice, but because others formed this bubble for me. This is how it started. I started refering to myself as the Bubble Boy. As you now know, its not because of the movie. Because of the bubble already formed around me, I started realizing that it wasn't all their fault. They were building the bubble from the outside, and I was building on it from the inside. I would not tell people my feelings and keeping information to myself. I figured that if people ignore me and don't talk to me, then they don't want to hear what I have to say. So the bubble started getting thicker and thicker. Then I realized that because of this bubble I could be alone for the rest of my life. I figured I would have pop this bubble or I could be a loser forever. So, slowly I tried being more open to people who seemed to give a shit about me. But later would stab me in the back and use that information to their advantage. I may be looking at it from a purely pessamist point of view, but that is they way I felt. Then I started this journal. Realizing no one reads this, I could tell everyone anything I wanted. It helps tear down some of the bubble, and I don't get hurt in return. I still refer to myself as the bubble boy, but only once in a while. Only when I feel people are keeping things from me, and I realize how lonely I am. I live in a metaphorical bubble that cannot be popped... I am... Bubble Boy. Until next time... Eat a Waffle.
Mood: normal
Music: Harder to Breathe - Maroon 5