| Well, yesturday we, my brother and me, went to my brother's friend's cabin. Dejon, otherwise know as DJ, invited us at the beginning of the summer, but we were finally able to go this weekend. It started pretty normal, we showed up, talked and then started drinking. Sean tried to make burgers on the grill, but the grill was too cold or something and didn't turn out. We tried again, this time they turned out, but they had no taste. DJ and Stanky went add bought beer and found this really cheap Canadian beer called Black Label. It is considered a fine canadian beer, even though it is made in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. That is fucked up. Anyway, Swank showed up and the drinking really began. Scooter drank way too much Vodka and ended up on the floor laughing his ass off. He found Djs SNES games and was freaking out about Bomberman Soccer, which later we found out was Mega-Man Soccer. He got so excited about it, he wanted to show DJ, so he whipped it at him, but luckly it missed, otherwise it would have hurt a lot. Scooter told him to throw it back at him. "I bet you five bucks I can catch it, five bucks... Your lucky you didn't say yes, otherwise you would have owed me five bucks." Later he found an old fashioned iron and was going to give it to Sean's girlfriend, but stopped, "I can't give this to you... your a girl." What he meant by that, not even he knows. Scooter eventually passed out, and the rest of us wanted to head to the bar.
DJ, Swank, Stanky, and I went to a bar that was about a half a mile away. Sean gave a us a ride there, even though I don't think it was needed. The car had to get filled up with gas though first, so we drove the opposite way to get to the gas station. It took longer to get to the gas station then it did to get to the bar. Either way we ended up at the bar. The first hour wasn't too exciting, we ordered pitchers of beer, drank them and realized how few women we there, and the ones that were, were really old. Eventually a bachlorette party showed up. Shwank and I desided to go see what was up. It turned out that most of them were underage. All the ones I talked to ended up haveing boyfriends, or was the bride to be. Shwank bought her a Yagger-Bomb, and basically was all over her. He ended up dancing and grinding her on the bar... yeah on top of the bar. Then another chick got up there and a big fat man who ended up taking his shirt off. That was when they were told to get down, I guess someone complained. DJ and Stanky eventually join us with the party of women. DJ asked where they were from, they said Freedom. DJ responds, "FREEDOM SUCKS!" at the exact moment the stereo was between songs and it was completely quite, so everyone in the bar heard it. Then they didn't want to talk to us anymore because he was our friend.
About this time we were on our fourth pitcher of beer, which we somehow got for free. Shwank bought a beer or a shot or something, and didn't have money to tip the bartender, so he took some money that was laying on the bar, and they guy got mad and took his money back. By the end of the night we made it through seven pitchers of beer, which was quite a bit for four people. We then desided to leave, which didn't take us too far... across the street to another bar is where we ended up. The bachlorette party was there, we got carded and Shwank started to grind the bride to be again, and the party ditched us for the second time. We left the bar and they we completely gone, so we went back to the other bar. I found out the bartender everyone was hitting on was also engaged to be married, and that didnt stop Swank. He tried to buy her a Yagger-Bomb also... but she hated those, so she didn't drink it. Later, DJ and Swank ordered another beer and later bought a shot, I think it was Vodka. DJ and Swank are about to take the shots but Shwank drops his in his beer and stares at it, DJ say, "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT FOR?" Swank eventually wandered to the bathroom where I think he finished it. I went to look for him, because this time we were actually going to leave. I walk in the bathroom and I see Shwank drop the shot glass and then putting the beer glass in his pocket. We then left to walk back a half a mile to the cabin.
On the way back, a cop stopped us and asked what was going on? We told him we were walking back to the cabin. He drove off, and came back, he asked if we needed a ride, I told him we only had a quarter of a mile to walk and we'd be fine. He asked if we were of age to drink and I said yeah, want to see my ID, he said no and asked if the others were 21, I said yeah. This is the question I still don't get, he asked, "Why didn't you drive home?" I said, "Because we are fucking drunk." I think the cop was pissed and drove away. He parked his car a few blocks away and was waiting for us. Stanky and I were a few feet infront of DJ and Shwank, and he flashed his searchlight on us. we kept walking and he shut it off. Then DJ walked past and the cop did the same. Swank somehow made it through without getting shined on, which was good since he wasn't 21. Stanky kind of freaked out, and he ran all the way back to the cottage. I tried to help DJ and Swank, but the rolled in the ditch and were talking to each other like I wasn't there. I tried to help them for 15 minutes and gave up. I wondered back to the cottage and it took DJ and Swank like an hour to get back, because we made and ate an entire pizza before they got back. DJ wondered in the door complained about his ankle and crashed in his bed, we didnt see him the rest of the night. Shwank sat in the chair eating chips feel asleep in the chair, but continued to eat the chips while asleep. I eventually want to sleep. Then today, we woke up and eventually go back home. This is where I leave you. Until next time... eat a waffle.
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